Sunday Night “Humor While we Wait” Posted by Mot at TNT
TNT:
Mot: ...... Aaaaaaahhhhhh - Pure Marital Bliss it is!!!!
A young couple got married and left for their honeymoon.
When they returned, the bride immediately called her mother.
“How was the honeymoon, sweetheart?” her mother asked.
“Oh, Mum, it was wonderful! So romantic!” the bride gushed. But suddenly, her voice cracked, and she burst into tears.
“What’s wrong, dear?” her mother asked, alarmed.
“Mum, it’s Sam,” the bride sobbed. “As soon as we got back, he started using the most horrible language—words I’d never heard before! Awful, horrible four-letter words! You’ve got to come and get me! Please, Mum!”
Her mother tried to calm her down. “Sarah, take a deep breath. It can’t be that bad. What kind of four-letter words?”
“I can’t say them, Mum,” the bride wept. “They’re so embarrassing! Please just come get me!”
“Darling, you need to tell me what he said. What could be so terrible?”
Through her tears, the bride finally confessed, “Mum, he said words like dust, wash, iron, and cook!”
Mot: ..... the husband asked his wife, “What did the doctor say?”
A woman went with her husband to his doctor’s appointment.
After the checkup, the doctor asked to speak with her privately.
He said, “Your husband is suffering from a serious illness, compounded by extreme stress. If you don’t follow these instructions, he’s unlikely to survive.”
The wife listened intently as the doctor continued:
“Each morning, prepare him a healthy breakfast and help him start the day in a good mood. For lunch, make sure he eats a nutritious meal, and for dinner, cook something extra special.
Avoid giving him any chores—he’ll likely be exhausted from work. Don’t bring up your problems, as it will only add to his stress. And lastly, make sure to fulfill his every sexual desire several times a week.”
The doctor concluded, “If you do all this consistently for 10 months to a year, I’m confident he’ll recover fully.”
On the drive home, the husband asked his wife, “What did the doctor say?”
Without hesitation, she replied, “You’re going to die.”
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Mot: . Me Yelling ~~~~at squirrels
Mot: You don’t know cold
