Some "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNT

Mot:  Her Diary: His Diary: The Difference Between Men And Women.

Her Diary:

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird.

We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner. I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on it. Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.

 I asked him what was wrong; He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset.

He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I loved him.

He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior I don't know why he didn't say, love you, too.' When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.

He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep — I cried.

I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.

My life is a disaster.

His Diary:

Motorcycle won't start...can't figure out why.

****************

Mot:   HE MUST PAY

Husband and wife had a argument..

 Wife called up her mum and said, "He fought with me again, I am coming to live with you mum."

Mum said, "No darling, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with you.”

**********

Mot: Lottery Winner

Mot: Doing Homework

Mot: When Walking through the Museum and ~~~~~

Mot:  ooooh ---- I Shirley Hope this Doesn't Happen to Me! ~~

Yet Another ""CLEVER"" idea on Raising the ""Wee Folks"" from Mot of course!

"Kicks and Grins" Posted by Mot at TNT

TNT:

Mot:  Honesty prevented this man who has nothing to keep the $10,000 he found and returned it to its owner.

Homeless Elmer picked up a piece of paper in the street. Having examined it, the man realized that he was holding a crumpled check for 10 thousand dollars. Elmer decided to still find the owner from that moment his life changed forever.

$10,000 could have helped Elmer get through the winter, but the man thought maybe that money was all the real owner had. The name on the check was Roberta José. Elmer got to the nearest Internet cafe and started looking for her contacts.

It soon became clear that Roberta was a successful realtor. Her business was often reported in the newspapers, so Elmer was able to quickly get the woman’s number. The man talked to her, explained the situation and arranged a meeting.

Roberta was struck by the act of the homeless. She believed that someone had already cashed the check and did not expect a refund.. Moreover, Roberta said that in her youth she herself was forced to remain without a roof over her head.

As a sign of gratitude, the woman provided Elmer with an apartment, paid for his education and is now going to hire him: One true act really helped a man change his life.

10 thousand dollars would be enough for him for a couple of months, now Elmer can think about the future.

Mot:  ... and Gas was only $.35 a gallon until a gas war....

Mot: ........ I Just Love the Dieting Tips I Find on da Net! ~~~

Mot:  .. NOPPPPERS!!! --- NADDDDA!! ~~~ Thanx Any Ways! ~~

Mot:  . and Yet Another ""Dating Tip"" from Mot! ~~~

Mot: .. and Yet Another ""Marital Tip"" from Mot of Course!

Mot:  .... Hmmmmmm Might be a Cosmic Thingy! ~~~

Mot:  .. Trust me Guys! - its a Marital Thingy! - It's in the Rule Book! ~

Friday Night "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNT

TNT:

Mot:  He was really proud of himself, having a quick, witty solution ...

This man went out with the boys, and told his wife that he would be home by midnight. At around 3 AM, drunk as a skunk, he headed for home. Just as he got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.

 Quickly he realized she'd probably wake up so he cuckooed another 9 times.

 He was really proud of himself, having a quick, witty solution, even when smashed, to escape possible conflict.

Next morning, his wife asked him what time he got in, and he told her 12 o'clock. She didn't seem disturbed at all.

Then she told him that they needed a new cuckoo clock.

When he asked her why, she said "Well it cuckooed 3 times, then 'Hiccuped', cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another 3, giggled, cuckooed 2 more times and tooted.

Mot:  I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull ......

I recently spent $6,500 on this registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow.

I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth.

Anyway......I had the Vet come and take a look at him. He said,, the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day.

The bull started to service the cows within two days……. all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbor's cows! He's like a machine!

I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him ... but they kind of taste like peppermint.

Mot:  .... and Another ""Texting Tip"" from Mot! ~~~

Mot:  .. Yet Another Joy of Becoming More Seasoned! ~~~ old band

Mot:  ...... LOL ...... Splains a few - Huh! ......

Mot:  ...... Ya Gots to be Careful What Ya Says to Kids! – LOL 

Sunday Night "Humor While We Wait" Posted by Mot at TNt

TNT:

Mot: A farmer had five female pigs. Times were hard, so he decided to take them to the county fair and sell them.

 At the fair, he met another Farmer who owned five male pigs. After talking a bit, they decided to mate the pigs and split everything 50/50.

The farmers lived sixty miles apart. So they agreed to drive thirty miles each, find a field in which to let the pigs mate.

The first morning, the farmer with the female pigs got up at 5 A.M., loaded the pigs into the family station wagon, (which was the only vehicle he had) and drove the thirty miles. While the pigs were mating, he asked the other farmer,

 "How will I know if they are pregnant?"

 The other farmer replied, "If they're lying in the grass tomorrow morning, they're pregnant. If they're in the mud, they're not."

The next morning the pigs were rolling in the mud. So he hosed them off, loaded them into the family station wagon again and proceeded to try again. This continued each morning for more than a week.

 Both farmers were worn out.

 The next morning he was too tired to get out of bed. He called to his wife,

 "Honey, please look outside and tell me whether the pigs are in the mud or in the grass."

 "Neither," yelled his wife. "They're in the station wagon and one of them is honking the horn."

************

Mot:  That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

So an elderly Italian man living alone in New Jersey wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, since the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:

 Dear Vincent,  I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.  Love, Papa

A few days later he received a letter from his son.

Dear Pop, Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.  Love, Vinnie

 At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left.

That same day the old man received another letter from his son.

 Dear Pop,  Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.   Love you,

Mot: ...... Takes Skill!! - fer Sure! ~~

Mot:  .. Yeppers! - as Ya Continue to become More Seasoned! ~~

Mot: ..... oooooh Deer! - the Things Folks Think Up ~ LOL 

Mot: .. aaaaaaahhhhhhhh --- hmmmmmmm -----siiggghhhhhhh 

Mot: .... Hmmmmmmmmmmm ....

Mot:  ..... We are NOT Alone!! --- Seeeeeeee 

Mot: ........ Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh –

Some "Kicks and Grins" Posted by Mot at TNT

TNT:

Mot:  ... What do you think of that Gus?

Out here on the ranch we got this one guy Gus who would always tell the biggest whoopers.

He'd lie just about everything and anything. We knew he was always lying cause what ever came out of his mouth was always so unbelievable.

So one day me and the boy's thought we teach him a lesson and tell him a big ole lie ourselves to show him just how ridiculous he was. Well we finally cornered him one day after church and told him how we were just sitting there in church waiting for the preacher to start when all of a sudden the front church doors busted wide open and in come running in this great big ole grizzly bear.

Not far behind it was this little lil chihuahua growling and snarling at that grizzly. And can you believe it that chihuahua attack, killed and ate that big ole grizzly.

What do you think of that Gus?

Then Gus say's, 'doesn't surprise me one bit that my dog would do that'.

Mot: Hope your day's going better than mine! ....

 I was walking out of the grocery store, headed toward my car in the parking lot. I got to my car and pulled on the door to open it, but it was locked.

 “Weird”, I thought, because I didn’t remember locking my car. I clicked the button on my key to open the door - and I heard the doors unlock.

Pulled on the door again. Still locked. So I click my keys again. And again I hear the doors unlock.

But I STILL can’t get in. So I’m standing there clicking and yanking on the door handle, totally baffled, when I feel someone near me.

I turn around and it’s an older couple, just staring at me. Because I’m trying valiantly to break into THEIR car.

Which is identical to MY car, parked right next to it.

I sputtered an apology and hurried around to my car, which was now ACTUALLY locked from me clicking the stupid button so many times.

Hope your day's going better than mine!

************

Mot:  ... Back in My Growing Up Daze!! ~~~~

Back in my day there was so much Toilet Paper and Eggs that we would throw  them at the houses of our enemies!

************

Mot .... they Also Sent me a ""Singing"" Coach! – siiggghhhhhhh 

Mot:  ... Yes !!! - You Can Take it With You!! ~~~

Mot: .... Recently - on a Cold Afternoon in Buffalo! ~~~

Mot:  ....... Only in Canada!!! ~~~~~

Mot:  ~~~~ This Is Soooo Meeeee! ~~~~

"Humor While We Wait...and Wait...and Wait" from Mot at TNT

Mot:  The beauty of married life

 A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin.

However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks.

The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!

One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?"

"My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheeks.

*****************

Mot:  Remember Murphy Laws.. What Goes Wrong will Do So at the Worst Possible Time- motorcycle riding

Mot:  .... Such a Special Moment for Her! ~~~~

Mot:  Hmmm - Wondering Just How Long and How Much This Costed! ~~

Mot: .... Yeppers! - definitely- a Marital Thingy!! ~~~~

Mot .. Now This Explains What Happened! –

Mot:  ... Poor little dude's gonna be traumatized for life. 

Friday Night "Kicks and Grins" Posted by Mot at TNT

TNT:

Mot:  “My dear friend, you do not understand.........

A man was asked to paint a boat. He brought his paint and brushes and began to paint the boat a bright red, as the owner asked him.

While painting, he noticed a small hole in the hull, and quietly repaired it.

When he finished painting, he received his money and left.

The next day, the owner of the boat came to the painter and presented him with a nice check, much higher than the payment for painting.

The painter was surprised and said “You've already paid me for painting the boat Sir!”

“But this is not for the paint job. It's for repairing the hole in the boat.”

 “Ah! But it was such a small service... certainly it's not worth paying me such a high amount for something so insignificant.”

“My dear friend, you do not understand. Let me tell you what happened:

“When I asked you to paint the boat, I forgot to mention the hole.

“When the boat dried, my kids took the boat and went on a fishing trip.

“They did not know that there was a hole. I was not at home at that time.

“When I returned and noticed they had taken the boat, I was desperate because I remembered that the boat had a hole.

“Imagine my relief and joy when I saw them returning from fishing.

“Then, I examined the boat and found that you had repaired the hole!

“You see, now, what you did? You saved the life of my children! I do not have enough money to pay your 'small' good deed.”

So no matter who, when or how, continue to help, sustain, wipe tears, listen attentively, and carefully repair all the 'leaks' you find. You never know when one is in need of us, or when God holds a pleasant surprise for us to be helpful and important to someone.

Along the way, you may have repaired numerous 'boat holes' for several people without realizing how many lives you've save.

Make a difference....be the best you...

Have a blessed day

************

Mot: .... this un is gunna keep me up at night!! ~~~

Mot:  .. I Don't Think I Could Do it!! – siiggghhhhh 

Mot:  .... Hmmmmmmm - Ya So!!??? ~~~~~

Mot: ... Loving Couple!! - You Can Just Tell!! ~~~~

Mot: .. just When Ya Think Urs is Too Much... Think of Calvin! ~~~

Mot: .... More - How it goes - LOL ......

News, Rumors and Humor Monday Night 1-2-2023

KTFA: Vietnam News:

Hanoi enters New Year with fresh optimism

11:46 | 01/01/2023

Facing a range of difficulties and challenges last year, Hanoi has realised and even exceeded all 22 of its socio-economic targets, Secretary of the municipal Party Committee Dinh Tien Dung told the Vietnam News Agency (VNA) in a recent interview.

According to the official, the capital city grew 8.8 percent, higher than the nation’s average level of about eight percent. It saw better-than-expected outcomes in its Gross Regional Domestic Product (GRDP), GRDP per capita, growth rate of export turnover, and reduction of poor households.

Dung said 2023 is key to Hanoi’s socio-economic development plan for the 2020-2025 period and takes the work theme of discipline, responsibility, action, innovation, and development.

This year, Hanoi will strive for an increase of 7 percent and above in GRDP, with its rates of social investment and export growth expected to hit 10.5-11 percent and 7.5-8 percent, respectively.

Concerning tasks to be completed to realise such goals, the official stressed improving the business climate and economic restructuring; developing the quality, effectiveness, and competitiveness of local craft villages; and encouraging the application of technological advances, among others.

The city will also work to complete its planning for 2021-2030 with a vision to 2050 for submission to the Prime Minister.

Dung said in the future, the capital will develop two affiliated cities – one to the north of the Red River (Me Linh-Soc Son-Dong Anh) andother to the west of Hanoi (Hoa Lac-Xuan Mai), serving as a premise for further growth.

Hanoi prioritises fostering cultural and social development to be on par with economic growth, while continuing its plan for investment in education, health, and culture, he affirmed.

VNA   LINK

*******************

Courtesy of Dinar Guru

Clare  Article: "What is meant by currency float? What are its advantages and disadvantages?” Quote:  "There are millions of traders around the world buying and selling currencies...The basis of the currency floating system is supply and demand. If the supply is greater than the demand, the value of the currency will decrease. On the contrary, if the demand is greater than the supply, its value will increase..."

Pimpy  Article: "Expert: No Concern About The Stability Of The Dinar With The Presence Of large Reserves Of The Dollar And Gold"  Remember I was telling you as they continue to increase their foreign reserve assets and their gold reserves the whole purpose of that was to help stabilize and protect the Iraqi dinar and that's what this economist is talking about...

********************

TNT:

CandyKisses:  Sudani stresses immunizing Iraq from currency smuggling and money laundering

Twilight News / Prime Minister Mohammed Shiaa al-Sudani stressed on Monday the need for economic reform and support for the sectors of agriculture, industry, tourism and trade, stressing the fortification of Iraq so as not to be a corridor for smuggling hard currency and money laundering.

The Sudanese Media Office said in a statement received by Shafaq News Agency that the latter conducted an inspection visit to the Ministry of Industry and Minerals to see the progress of work in the ministry's factories and companies. He also chaired a meeting of advanced owners, and listened to a summary given by the Minister of Industry on the Ministry's investment plan for development, its vision towards supporting

Al-Sudani stressed that his visit to the ministry at the beginning of the new year reflects the government's keenness to implement its ministerial platform, which focuses on services and the economy, noting that "economic reform is a prelude to social reform, which is not an intellectual luxury or for media consumption."

He pointed out that "the fluctuations of the exchange rate and their impact on the Iraqi economy, made us adhere to the inevitability of economic reform, and support agriculture, industry, tourism and trade, instead of Iraq being a market for imported goods and a corridor for smuggling hard currency and money laundering."

Al-Sudani pointed out that "Iraq has an opportunity to rise as an industrialized country, with an industrial identity, and that the government supports the industrial sector in this path."

He stressed "the need for industry to be away from political investment, and that partnership with the private sector contributes to the advancement of Iraqi industry," stressing "the protection of the local product as a means of supporting the private sector, and reducing the dumping of the local market with imported goods."

Al-Sudani directed to audit industrial development licenses, and to sponsor small and medium enterprises as they establish major projects, and contribute to job creation.

Mot:  .. You Can Always Count on Maxine to Stir da Pot!! ~~~

Mot:  ...... on and on and on and on .......

Mot: . Uh Oh! --- Got Caught on dat Un! ~~

Sabickfords "Greatest Hits and One-Liners" From Recaps Archives

From Recaps Archives:

Sabickford:  Warning- going to sleep on Sunday will cause Monday

I want to start juicing but I'm hesitant, I don't know how to juice Tacos

I've finally lost my mind. If found Don't bother to return it. It wasn't working properly anyway.

For the first time in forever, I decided to go shoot some pool tonight. You should have seen the look on the face of those swimmers.

Money cannot buy happiness, but it’s more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than on a bicycle.

I had My Wife Begging to me the other night - She was on her knees Begging - She Said Please come out from under the Bed and Fight Like A Man

I only do what the voices in my wife's head tell her to tell me to do…

Chinese proverb: "Man who want nurse for girlfriend must be patient"

Women spend more time wondering what men are thinking than men spend thinking.

There may be no excuse for laziness, but I'm still looking.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

'll bet you $4,567 you can't guess how much I owe my bookie.

I'm not saying it's hot outside but two Hobbits just threw a ring into my backyard

I hate it when people use big words just to make themselves sound perspicacious.

I'm great at multi-tasking - I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.

Tomorrow is "National Take Your Flask To Work Day!" I just made that up. Tell the Others,

I was born with my heart on my sleeve, a fire in my soul, and a mouth I can't control

Being married is like having the freedom to do whatever your wife tells you

It's ok to swallow your pride, You won't gain a pound

Inside me is a thin man trying to get out…I usually shut him up with chocolate.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels to make the cremation a bit more interesting.

I hate it when the voices in my heads go Silent… I never know what they are planning.

How many boxes of these Thin Mints do I have to eat before I start seeing results?

Wouldn't it be really fun if breast implants came with Squeaky toys inside them?

I'm not so sure about an inner child, but I have an inner idiot that surfaces from now and then.

Nothing Says 'I HATE YOU" like giving someone's Kid a Drum Set

TEENAGERS tired of being harassed by your parents? ACT NOW move out, get a job, and Pay your own way , QUICK while you still know everything!

A State trooper was asked on a Exam "What would you do if you had to arrest your mother?" In the Blank he put "Call for Backup!!!"

The cashier said Strip down, facing me. How was I to know she meant my debit card?

To All Trolls - So tell me.. Is your butt aware that you head had moved in?

When people cut you down or talk behind your back remember, they took time out of their pathetic lives to think about you.

You're not drunk until you have to grab onto the grass to keep from falling off the earth.

Sometimes life bites you in the Butt. Thankfully I have enough padding there to take the hit.

I sometimes put a sticky note on someone's car saying "Sorry for the Damage" . It's kind of funny watching them look for the damage.

Be the reason someone smiles today! Or the reason they drink. Whatever works.

I need a part-time job that pays $30,000 a week.

My brain is experiencing technical difficulties. Please stand by…

Don't they already have enough comedians in Politics?

Karma is like a rubber band. You can only stretch it so far before it comes back and SMACKS you in the face.

Never water yourself down just because someone can't handle you 100 proof

A police office came to my house and asked me where I was between 5 & 6. He seemed annoyed when I answered 'Kindergarten"

The more you weigh the harder you are to kidnap. Stay Safe - Eat cake.

I'm 100% sure I called shotgun, while you were shoving me in the back. Yea I realize I'm being arrested but the rules of shotgun are pretty clear, Man.

I hate those people who knock on your door and tell you need to be 'Saved" or you will "Burn". Stupid Firemen

I started on a new diet. It's called the "I have $10 until Friday" diet

Not one drop of my self worth depends on your acceptance of me

If procrastination was an Olympic Sport, I'd compete in it later.

I Think my problem is that I have really Fantastic bad ideas

I stopped explaining myself when I realized people only understand from their level of perception.

Don't believe all the rumors you hear about me, the truth is much worse.

Old People at weddings always poke me and say "You're Next!" So I started doing the same thing to them at Funerals.

I Hate Tacos! Said No Juan Ever

I have been putting a lot of thought into it and I don't think being an adult will work for me.

Sometimes the first steps to forgiveness is understanding the other person is an idiot.

I hate the term "Crazy" - I Prefer Happy with Benefits.

When I was a kid you didn't have to say "Don't Try This At Home!" Because we weren't complete morons back then.

I believe that everyone else my age is an adult, whereas I am merely in disguise

When does Hibernation start because I am 100% participating in that.

The fact that jellyfish have survived for 650 million years without a brain has given hope to many people.

Insanity is Hereditary. You get it from your kids.

I'm not much on Seizing the Day, I just poke at it with a stick.

I swear some people need a stamp on their forehead saying "DON"T REPRODUCE"

My bank has a new service where they text you your balance. It's cool, I just don't think they should add "LOL" at the end

If Being sarcastic burned calories, I'd be transparent by now.

“I need to talk to you!!" These six words have the ability to make you instantly recall every bad thing you have ever done, and some you didn't

You know it's been a good day when you didn't have to unleash the flying monkeys.

Don't be afraid of being outnumbered. Remember Eagles fly alone. Pigeons flock together.

Relationships are like a walk in the park- Jurassic park

The hardest part of parenting is trying to fake mad when your kid does something bad but Hilarious.

My soulmate is out there somewhere, pushing a pull door. I just know it.

Now they've invented a pregnancy test with a curved handle so you don't get pee on your hands. Listen, if you aren't ready to get pee on your hands, you definitely NOT ready for Motherhood.

Our town was so small the we didn't have a town Drunk, So we all took turns.

 Look, I'm trying to Rant Here. Stop interrupting me with Facts and Reason

Not to Brag.. I don't even need alcohol to make bad decisions.

I am fluent in three languages…English, Sarcasm, and Profanity

My Morning coffee makes me feel like I have my stuff together. I don't. But it makes me feel like I do.

My son asked me to explain women to him, SO I bought him a Xbox game for his PlayStation.

I don't need someone who sees the good in me. I need someone who sees the Bad and still wants me.

You are going to be Fine. You come from a long line of Lunatics.

I think I need professional Help. A Chef, A Butler and A Maid should do it.

In a packed Elevator, everyone is silent. Stomach: I will now Demonstrate the Mating call of a Whale.

If you line up all your Ex's in a row you can see the flow chart of your mental Illness.

Don't use the Bathroom in your dream…It's a Setup!!!

Before you ask me to babysit I think you should know that I think kids are super funny when they're drunk.

Eggs are fantastic for a fitness Diet. Don't like the taste? Add cocoa, butter, flour, sugar & butter. Bake 30 Min.

Got emotions? There's Alcohol for that.

And then alcohol said "put that on Facebook, it's hilarious". But alcohol was wrong, So Very wrong.

Sometimes it's just more fun to take the low road.

Remember to look both ways before crossing a woman.

Some things are better left unsaid. Which I realize right after I have said them.

Someone offered me grapes but I declined. I'm not used to taking wine in pill form.

I'm not Cheap, but I am on special this week.

That awkward moment when you're singing a song you often sang as a child - and you suddenly understand the lyrics.

Judging by the looks of my hair this morning, I think I may be a Muppet.

Shout out to everyone who got through the day without taking a nap. Pulled a All-Dayer! Pretty Cool!

I think way too many people have been drinking from the Fountain of Stupid

Well what day will you have time for my shenanigans?

Lieabetes (Lie-a-bee-tees) -noun- A serious affliction some people suffer from that prevents them from being able to tell the truth regardless of the situation.

I Planned to take over the world, But I'm Tired

I found some things to do today. They're called mimosas

Wine-O-Lympics Everyone's a winner in these games

The revised Serenity Prayer…God grant me the strength to accept things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the devoted friends who will post bail money when I snap.

Redneck word of the Week Twerk….Imma have two more beers then it's back to TWERK

This antidepressant works best if you take it with water lapping near your hammock on a Caribbean beach.

I've expanded my skills. I can now forget what I'm doing while I'm actually doing it.

I never thought I would be the kind of person that would get up early to exercise. I was right.

Wish me luck in the Olympics. Just kidding I'm on my forth cupcake.

Dear God, I've been very good today- No grumpy thoughts, no swearing, no smacking people in the head and no whining at all. But I'm about to get out of bed so I may need some help with the rest of the day.

Some of the best moments in life are the ones you can't tell anybody about.

The secret to being happy is having a good sense of humor and a Dirty Mind

The Lysol commercial told me to disinfect the things I touch the most. I have a feeling that this is going to burn.

We have to stop this recent culture of people telling us they're "Offended" and expecting us to care

I 've learned so much from my mistakes I'm thinking of making a few more

It's been one of those "I can no longer be held responsible for my actions" kind of days

What do you call a sleepwalking Nun? A Roamin' Catholic

You may not have lost all your marbles, but there's definitely a hole in your bag.

I used to be crazy but one of my voices is a therapist and declared I am sane.

Just call me the little engine that said "Ok, but I need a cup of coffee first."

What does it mean when Holy water sizzles when it hits your skin (asking for a friend)?

Some say that their body it a temple…Mine is a bouncy castle

Diet Tip: If you feel hungry you could really be just Thirsty. Drink a pitcher of Margaritas and see how you feel.

Today I bought a doughnut without the sprinkles. Diets are hard.

If Pigs could fly imagine how good their wings would taste.

Never ask a woman eating ice cream straight from the carton if she is OK.

Oh Lord, Please Keep all the stupid people from breeding. We are getting badly outnumbered down here.

When you see my head tilt to the right and I start to stare into space, I would RUN! The voices inside my head gave me a brilliant idea. Be very Afraid!

The first five days after the weekend are the hardest.

Chocolate comes from cocoa, which comes from a tree. That makes it a plant, therefore , Chocolate counts as a salad. You're Welcome.

I run entirely on Caffeine and Inappropriate thoughts.

Why Weigh yourself? You could set yourself on Fire and then roll in Broken glass and still feel the same way.

Don't cling to a mistake just because you spent time making it.

Everyone has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack.

New Year's Eve "Kicks and Grins" Posted by TNT Members 12-31-2022

TNT:

Mot:   A woman decided to give herself a big treat for her 70th birthday by staying overnight in a really nice hotel..

When she checked out the next morning, the desk clerk handed her a bill for $250.00.  She demanded to know why the charge was so high "I agree it's a nice hotel, but the rooms aren't worth $250..00 for just an overnight stay - I didn't even have breakfast!"  The clerk told her that $250.00 is the 'standard rate,' and breakfast had been included had she wanted it. 

She insisted on speaking to the Manager.

The Manager appeared and, forewarned by the desk clerk, announced: "This hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center which are available for use." 

"But I didn't use them." 

'Well, they are here, and you could have." He went on to explain that she could also have seen one of the in-hotel shows for which they were so famous."We have the best entertainers from the world over performing here." 

"But I didn't go to any of those shows.."  "Well, we have them, and you could have." 

No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, she replied, "But I didn't use it!" and the Manager countered with his standard response. 

After several minutes discussion, and with the Manager still unmoved, she decided to pay, wrote a check and gave it to him.

The Manager was surprised when he looked at the check.  "But Madam, this check is for only $50.00" 

"That's correct I charged you $200.00 for sleeping with me." 

"But I didn't!"  "Well, too bad, I was here, and you could have."

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CandyKisses:  CHUCK'S NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS

Mot: ...... Yeppers! - I Agrees!! - This One WILL Work!! ~~~

CandyKisses:  IS ANYONE HERE?

Mot: ... Needs to Set Me Alarm ~~~~~for midnight

CandyKisses:  WHAT IF YOUR NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION.....

Mot: ....... Fur Rent He is - fur say - $50 an hour ~~~~~

Mot: ...... Fine Print!! --- MUST Read da Fine Print!!! ~~

Mot:  .. Last day of 2022! Hope you have a great day…

News, Rumors and Humor Friday Night 12-30-2022

KTFA:

Frank26:  "FROM HOT POTATOES TO HOT TAMALES THE EXCHANGE RATE IS MUY CALIENTE!!!".......F26

 Potato: Al-Sudani's measures to reduce the exchange rate contributed to the stability of the local markets

 12/30/2022

Today, Thursday, the representative of the Tasmeem Taher Al-Battat movement confirmed that the measures taken by the Prime Minister, Muhammad Shia'a Al-Sudani, to reduce the exchange rate of the dollar against the dinar, contributed effectively to the stability of the local markets .

Al-Battat said in a statement received by the Iraqi News Agency (INA): "The step of selling the dollar directly to citizens for the purpose of travel will greatly limit the corrupt control of the hard currency."

He added, "Such steps increase the citizen's confidence in the government, maintain market stability and reduce high prices."  LINK

Frank26:  "OH MY GOODNESS!!!... THE WHOLE WORLD IS DEPENDING ON THE IRAQI DINAR TO MAKE IRAQ A CENTRAL HUB!!!"....... F26

Association of Banks: Central Bank measures will restore the money market to balance

12/29/2022

On Thursday, the Association of Iraqi Private Banks confirmed its support for the Central Bank's measures to control the money market.

The Association's advisor, Samir Al-Nusairi, said in a statement, "Our banks, which were identified by the Central Bank, considered them additional outlets for providing US dollars to traveling citizens, which they need for the purposes of travel and treatment, at the price of 1470 dinars, with borders and a flexible and smooth mechanism throughout the days of the week, in addition to Fridays, Saturdays and official holidays." 

He added, "The Central Bank worked to increase the weekly share of these banks to 1,800,000 dollars, and under on-site and field follow-up by the bank," noting that "our banks have always been known for their national and supportive role to support the central bank's measures in the economic crises that Iraq has gone through previously and now." .

He stressed that “the decisions issued by the Central Bank, and the new mechanisms and instructions related to raising interest rates and the special commission for the investment financial products of the Central Bank, so that banks can invest their surplus liquidity with the bank according to special details, and open the windows of forward investment (90 days, 182 days, 364 days) and issue new mechanisms.” For deposits for banks wishing to participate in the currency window, it allows banks to purchase any amounts in foreign currency and deposit them in accounts used for external transfers only, and interest / returns are paid on those balances according to the new mechanism.

He pointed out that "the Central Bank took measures during the past two weeks to increase the supply and provision of the dollar to merchants, businessmen and importers through banking outlets directly without the mediation of intermediaries, which will restore the money market to its balance regardless of any political news, fabrications, fabrications and non-specialized analyzes."

Al-Nusairi explained, "The central bank's assurances of the availability of foreign cash reserves exceeding $96 billion and its ability to supply dollars in sufficient quantities to meet the requirements of demand will inevitably enable it to control the money market quickly."

Al-Nusairi called on the competent government agencies to "assign the Central Bank's procedures in accordance with its tasks and duties contained in its law in force and its previous successful experiences, to control the exchange rate," calling on "the national media with all its visual, audio and print means to support the procedures and decisions issued by the Central Bank."

He pointed out that "the governor of the Central Bank confirmed that the economic situation of our resources from the US dollar cannot be compared to the case of Lebanon and neighboring countries," stressing that "the current rise is temporary and will return to its previous levels, and the Iraqi dinar will continue to be strong and stable."  LINK

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Frank26:  "THE INTERNATIONAL PLATFORMS WHERE THE IQD WILL FLOAT ARE AT 100%!!!".........F26

Al-Sudani Advisor: The external transfer platform meets 90% of the market demand for currency

12/29/2022

Baghdad - Conscious - Nassar Al-Hajj

Today, Thursday, the advisor to the Prime Minister, Mazhar Muhammad Salih, clarified about fluctuations in the exchange rate of the dollar in the Iraqi market, while confirming that the external transfer platform meets 90% of the market demand for foreign currency.

Saleh said, to the Iraqi News Agency (INA), that "Iraq is one of the largest countries in the region in its current reserve financial capabilities," explaining that "rumors and gossip began to circulate among people as a result of the fluctuations in the exchange market, following the adoption of international controls that surrounded the work of the external transfer platform." Which meets 90 percent of the market demand for foreign currency.

He added, "We would like to reassure everyone that, with the increasing transparency of the information provided by the commercial community requesting financing its import in foreign currency through effective mediation by the Central Bank and passing through the international auditing platform, the collection of foreign currency is increasing to meet the requirements of foreign trade and is achieved immediately and at the official exchange rate of 1460 dinars to the dollar.

He pointed out that "the financial market is in an adjustment phase to rearrange its conditions in the correct and orderly direction, and there are no concerns," noting that "the government economy constitutes the center of gravity in organizing economic life and possesses sufficient basic ingredients in supporting and stabilizing the market economy."

The prime minister's advisor called for "rejecting misleading rumors launched by speculators and enemies of stability."  LINK

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Courtesy of Dinar Guru

Frank26  Article:  "Urgent.. Governor of the Central Bank of Sudan: The foreign currency crisis is urgent for technical reasons"  THE MIDDLE EASTERN CURRENCIES THAT WILL BE IN A BASKET SOON ARE DEPENDING HEAVILY ON THE IQD TO GAIN POWER TO LEAD THEM.

Militia Man  The UST has Iraq's CBI in a position to make a exchange rate change, imo.. They are likely at a point now there is no looking back in not doing so.  Show time? It looks that way. There were meetings today with the CBI Governor.

TNT:

Mot:  .. oooooh Nooooo - Blonde Men Jokes! ~~~~

Mot ... Getting REady fer da New Year I am! ~~

CandyKisses:  OUR NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS BEGIN IN TEN MINUTES